A Tour Through My Mind

really been so long since i blogged. Probably about a year???.. i think so…  it’s been a hectic day… and everyday’s gonna be like this. It’s not easy teaching the year 2s. not easy at all.. and i can somewhat feel the pressure and the burn out maybe.. too early for a burn out. I’m starting to really enjoy being a form teacher. Having a form class. i think it gives me the opportuniy to really do what i want – touch lives. And well.. someone seemed to imply today that perhaps the subject is too demanding for me because after all it’s not my first subject. Well hello… it doesn’t matter if it’s my first subject or not. I do admit that i really have a lot to learn. But i think it’s more of the pedagogy aspect. Well we’ll see how… if my log entries get more frequent, it means i;m more stressed. Blogging is one way i release my negative energy. Otherwise.. i don’t know how long i’ll last. And since i’m planning to make this my lifetime career, i better learn the ways to cope with stress.

work has been quite hectic. with the u-21 tournament going on and the trainings i will have to cover.. it’s really tiring. i don’t feel i’m well rested during the weekends. Feels quite lonely since you’re not around. but i’m coping well.. missing you.. but don’t worry, i can take care of myself. I feel happy around the B girls.

there’s no doubt a lot of improvement to be done in our team.. but.. looking back at how we started the league.. it’s definitely commendable that we got this far. The last thing we want is for complacency to set in. Whatever it is, if we aim to improve our performance with each premeir league, then we are on the right track. the objective for the long term is always to improve with each meact or each tournament we play. That’s where we want to head as a club. We should learn from other teams that are better than us. Learn what is meant to be learnt and discard the plenty of examples that police had showed that are not worth emulating. Well, sure, we should be like them in terms of their passing, off the ball running and all that.. They make a terrible role model in terms of character development. They have no sportsmanship to say the least.

in future, when we get better, when we start winning, from where i see it, we can do it in 2 ways. 1  is to win graciously. 2 is to win but without recognition from others. Police women’s team belongs to which category? You don’t need me to tell you.

 It’s disgraceful enough that the ugly ones we were once in our school. Obviously they didn’t get fulfilling education during that time.

we had a fantastic game against T’sians in the Premier League. Against all odds, without Nordin, with only 2 reserves and the umpires constantly blowing against us, we achieved a 3-0 result. More rewarding than the result was of course the process. We were playing really well against some of the national players in their tea, including a China born player. Needless to say? who do we have? We do not have any star player… But of course, our strength actually lies in each individual.. that’s the beauty of our team. Looking back, that game was exceptionally enjoyable. This is also the game that led us into the semi finals. I didn’t know at first. I kept tallying up the results table and trying all possible combinations and it seemed certain that we have no chance in the semis. The one day later, Farha pointed out that the rule states that in the event of same no. of points, the teams will be ranked according to the no. of games won.. and we won 5 games while theresians won 4.. so we are through…

 This is a landmark victory for us.. Beating T’sians twice, winning Dutch club in the 2nd game after beaten by them in the first, keeping SRC at 2-1 (smallest scoreline against them) and of course ranked 3rd in the Premier League table for now.. qualifying for semi-finals … oh my…. it’s simply overwhelming.

BUT IT’S GREAT!!! Our dreams have come true. We have really proven ourselves that we are force to be reckoned with. Great Work Crescent!

i don’t think i’m coping well.. i think cos i’m not working effectively. Sigh.. so overwhelmed with work. many things to do. i didn’t even know what to teach anymore.. simply because there’s so much to cover. sigh… i’m just too tired. i spoke to my geog colleague… she offered some advice and gave me some resources.. and she said don’t tell anyone else that i’m not coping. if anyone asks, just say that i’m doing my best to cope. i don’t know what’s the rationale lah.. perhaps she did it to protect me against politics.. well.. whatever..

it’s a long national day weekend.. starts from thursday to sunday.. that’s great.. if i get to go away and really enjoy myself somewhere.. relax and don’t worry about anything. BUT.. well.. i’m stuck for 4 days with marking to do.. well.. from here on it’s gonna be crazy. the assignments and tests.. the more assignments bthe students have to do.. the more marking i have to do.. sigh… if i’m given a choice, i don’t want to set assignment. then i don’t need to mark.. but what to do.. the orders come from on top.. sigh..

so all in all..no holidays for me. so sad

been awhile since i updated the blog. didn’t even get to write anything about Melbourne trip.

 Started at Innova for 6 weeks now. i feel the environment is alright.. but overworked. straddling between geog and pe is not an easy task at all. its really challenging not only in terms of workload.. it’s very very difficult to straddle between 2 departments. i get the feeling that each department is not happy in the sense that i don’t fully belong to any of them. and in a way its difficult for them to delegate jobs to me.. but as it is, i already have my hands full. i’m very overburdened with geog. but i enjoy teaching geog… just teaching in tutorial will do.. but lecturing?? and setting whole level assignments? and setting the midcourse exams??? it’s really bad lah..

my PE colleagues envy me cos there are some days that i end early while all of them end late cos of PE class or cca and the geog side, they envy me cos i only have 3 geog classes while they have 5 or 6… sigh… i just find it overwhelming.. with reno works and the wedding coming along…

we played without a goalkeeper the weekend before against SRC and we did well. So now that our only keeper has gone for holidays, we had no keeper for the games during the weekend. So for both games, against Police and Jansenites, i played as keeper. It’s a real challenge. but i did my best. we lost to Police 3-0 and won jansenites 2-1. we played very well against police team but poor marking let us down. of course i think i’ll do much better in my natural position.. but i’m getting quite comfortable playing as keeper. i don’t mind playing keeper but i do realise too that it weakens our forward line since it’s clear that i’m the only one who usually takes shot at goal. i hope the other forwards can step up their game and take shots at goal and convert the opportunities for goals.

the team is trying their best to cope without our keepers. there’s really nothing else we can do about this. It’s good that they are staying positive and we are playing well defensively. Hopefully we can keep this up and keep on improving on our scorelines to meet our target for the tournament. So we have met the target for each game. last year we lost to police 2-0 and 4-0 in the 1st and 2nd round respectively. this year we lost to them 3-0 in  the first round. hopefully we can better the scoreline for the 2nd round with or without keeper. then we would have truly met our target.

hahhaa.. and so Faizal.. at last.. now you know.. hahha.. your shocked look .. i think can win best kodak moment of the year.. if there is such an award. it’s really funny.. but the way you broke the news to Dahlia is equally funny lah.. i just wondered who’s kodak moment was better.. yours or hers..

anyway.. i’m glad i have your support Bro, thanks so much . i really appreciate it and not to mention.. need it as much also..

i hope our friendship will be cemented even more after this rather than drift apart.