A Tour Through My Mind

some days i feel like i just have to drag myself to work.. wake up in the morning and go through the routine.. get to school and execute the lessons as planned for the students. Once a while when i have a bad daay.. like today and i meet challenging students, all i can do is hang my head low.. and shake my head. i have no energy to stand up against the rude remarks. Such days are hard to get by. when some other students smile at me.. and greet me along the corridor or ask me if they’re gonna play soccer for pe.. i feel a little better. i feel like i’m drifting in the open sea holding on to a piece of floating log. sometimes when the waves are strong i get hit again and again.. the relentless pounding is unforgiving, resolved to make me lose grip of the pathetic log. sometimes, the sea is calm, the breeze is cool and there is some light rain to rejuvenate me, washing away the salty water off my face and lips. these rare moments give me hope of better things to come.

i sit back and i ponder. the students here are challenging.. this means that there is better opportunity to change lives here. But i’m afraid that i will be worn out in this kind of ennvironment. While i aspire to be a teacher who changes lives, build character and earns the respect of students, i’m not sure if i will be what i aspire to be. I’m struggling with my PE classes.. while I am cconfident with my Geography classes, my bubble is burst when i think about teaching geography at JC. Am i up to it? I really don’t know. i’m afraid to think of what’s to come. I feel exhausted.. and this is only practicum. half the normal workload of teachers. Will i be able to thrive in this stressful environment? Will i be able to ssurvive? I hope that i will but i fear the worst.

I liek the way my geog CT handles his class.. he’s very innovative in the way he teaches and it shows that he made effort to plan the lessons and think of fun things for the kids to do so that they’re more receptive to learning geog. it’s so different from the way i was taught when i was in Sec 1. he also showcased different startegies to handling kid’s behaviour. yah the word here is showcased.. ahaha.. cos he said that some of the strategies he doesn’t really use.. but he will show how its carried out for my benefit. things to learn from him.. always do things that keep you happy. do enough to cover yourself (ass) so that you’ll cope better and won’t be burnt out easily. employ different ‘attention-gaining’ strategies without the use of your voice. – that means don’t shout.. use signals or.. other intruments that can be loud. and also.. he says don’t need to worry about resources because the textbook is not published by MOE already. it’s by outside vendors so they’re more competitive and so the resources are quite good lah.. got powerpoint slides done according to chapter already.. so much easier. don’t need to do own slides! and got games included in the software.. oh great! that means.. well less to plan or rather don’t need to start from scratch. yeay! hahaha.. ok got to go.. tonight going bangkok!! hooray weekend holiday.